Everything looks perfect from far away

On the news this evening it was reported that researchers have deduced that yesterday, January 24th, is the most depressing day of the year. Due to factors like bad weather, debt due to holiday season, and failure to keep up with New Year's resolutions, the general population was scientifically proven to be pouty. I know I can breathe easier now that this information is exposed. Time well spent, scientists.

I've decided in the last couple of days, through various conversations, that though some people would classify themselves as being observant or analytical in their own minds, there's a distinction between those who draw conclusions from their observations and those who don't. I, for one, have the astounding ability to think for a considerable length of time about a given topic and come out of it with nothing but a bit of wasted time and a slightly glazed expression. If you've ever seen the quality film Donald Duck in Mathmagic Land, you might remember the part where Mr. Narrator enters Donald's mind to discover a disorganized clutter of papers and files that represent his thoughts and intelligence. For all non-simple, non-school related things, I think that's rather akin to how my mind is. A ton of information and observations packed in a manner that tallies them as present but fails to provide any sort of organized means for drawing and communicating conclusions.

In other news, I appear to be going through another one of my more antisocial stages, which has caused a considerable increase in personal productivity. I've been leaving tech early to run errands and stick to the fitness schedule my mom and I agreed on, and spending my time catching up on projects and working on musical designs. Through this I've judged that if I had absolutely no friends, I'd probably even get all my homework done (without considering the fact that in that scenario I'd also probably be hopelessly depressed and spend a solid portion of that work time drowning socially awkward sorrows in cookie dough and Gilmore Girls).

3 Random Thoughts:

1) Such Great Heights by Iron & Wine is an amazing song.

2) I wish I could walk around invisible and with a camera for a day, inconspicuously taking shots of whatever I saw.

3) I relate to Cathi more than anyone else alive.

Constantly talking isn't necessarily communicating

I've decided that the movies I like best are the ones that portray themes or morals that I'm already conscious of, but don't mind being reminded about. For example:

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Theme: All memories and experiences are worth holding on to. The bad are as necessary as a good, and serve as contrast.

Spiderman

Theme: Nerds can be awesome, too.

SLC Punk

Theme: Anarchy and other youth subcultures, though they help mold who one becomes in adulthood, are largely meaningless.

American Beauty

Theme: Life is incredible if you lift your eyes up enough to notice it.

High Fidelity

Theme: Music, lyrics, and lists are perfect for any explanation or situation.

A Princess Bride

Theme: Witty phrasing and a formidable vocabulary is all you need to get ahead in life.

Any Disney Movie

Theme: If you are female and a good person, eventually love and happiness will come to you. Sooner if you are anorexic, have unusually large eyes, or have a single parent dad.

Like a firework unexploded, wanting life but never knowing how

All State notables:

- The whole experience is, in general, so different from NVHS tech. Not in the basic action, because clearly they both entail building sets, but because of the people and the way we interact. The only thing all of us had in common was theatre, and through/because of that most all of us became friends. But for all of us our first and primary goal was putting on a show, preferably a good one, so within the attempts to befriend all the people around you, everyone was extremely focused and took it seriously.

- On Thursday, about 5 hours before we were to perform Ragtime in front of a real audience, and during the intermission to a dress rehearsal, the techies were told that an actor complained that our 10ish foot tall platforms were unstable and were consequently condemned by a safety team unless we altered them. A massive hour long revamp of the platforms and staircases ensued, in which we had to replace or add to all the braces and supports. That was secondary to what I thought was most memorable, though, which was the fact that when Bob (TD) told us, no one really complained or pouted about it, and we all just focused went instantly to work and finished what needed to get done. Then we talked about it.

- If Matt comes and tech directs for NVHS, I will be the happiest person alive.

- On our last performances on Saturday, the entire cast, pretty much, was bawling through the numbers. More specifically, the song before intermission and the final scene for the last show. Most notably, Devin, a lead, was heartbreaking to watch during the second to last song. As Brian sang his solo song I was watching Devin's face as he struggled so hard to keep his expression impartial. By the end of the song Brian belted out an amazing higher, final note than what's written and Devin just couldn't do it anymore. Though I think we could all sympathize with the fact that we were about to finish with something we'd been working on for five months and leave people who, for the most part, we'd never see again, the crew didn't get emotional and largely found the actor's behavior a little humorous. I wasn't surprised.

- It feels weird to be home. We were only gone since Tuesday, but for those days we were completely cut off from our usual schools and cities, constantly working and laboring around people we'd only seen at specific times over the last several months. We'd work long hours, really appreciate food breaks, and sleep whenever we got the chance. Now being back at home, sitting down, being alone or around very familiar faces, not doing anything urgent and surrounded again by The Bubble feels strange, or at least slightly anticlimactic.

- I'd say 95% of the kids there I will never see again, and about 90% I'll never talk to again (though that's including those I never met in the first place, like orchestra members). I never got any screen names or phone numbers, so I'm just hoping anyone who cares to stay in touch with me will contact me.