Like a firework unexploded, wanting life but never knowing how

All State notables:

- The whole experience is, in general, so different from NVHS tech. Not in the basic action, because clearly they both entail building sets, but because of the people and the way we interact. The only thing all of us had in common was theatre, and through/because of that most all of us became friends. But for all of us our first and primary goal was putting on a show, preferably a good one, so within the attempts to befriend all the people around you, everyone was extremely focused and took it seriously.

- On Thursday, about 5 hours before we were to perform Ragtime in front of a real audience, and during the intermission to a dress rehearsal, the techies were told that an actor complained that our 10ish foot tall platforms were unstable and were consequently condemned by a safety team unless we altered them. A massive hour long revamp of the platforms and staircases ensued, in which we had to replace or add to all the braces and supports. That was secondary to what I thought was most memorable, though, which was the fact that when Bob (TD) told us, no one really complained or pouted about it, and we all just focused went instantly to work and finished what needed to get done. Then we talked about it.

- If Matt comes and tech directs for NVHS, I will be the happiest person alive.

- On our last performances on Saturday, the entire cast, pretty much, was bawling through the numbers. More specifically, the song before intermission and the final scene for the last show. Most notably, Devin, a lead, was heartbreaking to watch during the second to last song. As Brian sang his solo song I was watching Devin's face as he struggled so hard to keep his expression impartial. By the end of the song Brian belted out an amazing higher, final note than what's written and Devin just couldn't do it anymore. Though I think we could all sympathize with the fact that we were about to finish with something we'd been working on for five months and leave people who, for the most part, we'd never see again, the crew didn't get emotional and largely found the actor's behavior a little humorous. I wasn't surprised.

- It feels weird to be home. We were only gone since Tuesday, but for those days we were completely cut off from our usual schools and cities, constantly working and laboring around people we'd only seen at specific times over the last several months. We'd work long hours, really appreciate food breaks, and sleep whenever we got the chance. Now being back at home, sitting down, being alone or around very familiar faces, not doing anything urgent and surrounded again by The Bubble feels strange, or at least slightly anticlimactic.

- I'd say 95% of the kids there I will never see again, and about 90% I'll never talk to again (though that's including those I never met in the first place, like orchestra members). I never got any screen names or phone numbers, so I'm just hoping anyone who cares to stay in touch with me will contact me.